I wish I didn't feel so...lost"
I hear things like this over and over. I have really been struck by the fact lately that we live in a world where many people are suffering and hurting, and people can't seem to find joy, and can't seem to find a purpose in life. Maybe it was just better kept quiet before, but it seems to me like in the past couple years depression has sky rocketed. More and more I hear about people suffering from depression, suicidal thoughts, anxiety, stress, a huge lack of confidence, etc. People are lonely, hurting, empty, scared, angry... the list goes on. I think many of us go through these things at some point, and if you are blessed enough not to, you know people who are dealing with it.
"I wish I didn't feel so lost."
I was having a conversation with my friend and she said that to me. Earlier that morning, I had been sitting at my piano playing and singing Amazing Grace, and that first verse really jumped out at me.
"Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound, that saved a wretch like me. I once was lost, but now I'm found, was blind, but now I see."
We can feel lost, and insecure, and hurt, but the truth is that we are FOUND, LOVED, REDEEMED, and so precious in the eyes of Christ! We have purpose! There is a difference between living according to out emotions, and living according to truth. I am learning so much about choice right now. Even today, as I was driving home, I found myself sinking into it: self-pity, depression, discontent. I had to consciously make a choice. "Choose Christ." I have a choice to focus on myself, and to allow myself to be consumed in my own depression and self, but I know that that is not the way I want to live, so every moment, I need to choose to focus on truth. When I am insecure about the way I look, I have to shut that voice up, and tell myself that I'm beautiful - that God thinks I'm beautiful. Sometimes it is hard to believe this, but God is faithful, and continues to work in my heart. God says, "My thoughts are not your thoughts, and neither are your ways my ways." (Isaiah 55:8) Our God is in control and has plans we know nothing about! I'm at the point in my life where I can look back and see things from a new perspective. Circumstances that once were so painful and overwhelming now seem insignificant, but as I look back on them, I realize how blessed I am that I have a God who not only knew what was best for me, but a God who gives and takes away, working all things together for my good. It's all about trusting, and choosing where to focus our thoughts. If you're reading this, you are precious and loved, and God has good plans for you! Satan will do everything he can do to discourage you, and attack, but take a minute a remind of yourself of what God has to say!
I have been so challenged this past year in what it means to place my identity solely in Christ, and to find all of my satisfaction, value, love, security, beauty, and acceptance in Him. Unless we understand who God is, we cannot understand who we are. My entire identity should be in Christ Jesus. If I am completely honest with myself, there are lies that I have believed about myself that warp the satisfaction and fulfillment I should find in Christ. For as long as I can remember, I have struggled with body-image, and with being "good-enough" for people. Lies that I have believed tell me I'm not good enough, pretty enough, funny enough, or talented enough. However, I belong to God! These worldly things are physical and temporary, plus those lies are just that - lies! Jeremiah 31:3 says, "I have loved you with an everlasting love!", and Ephesians 1:4 tells me that God chose me! Next time you feel unloved or unwanted, remember those verses! Take that lies!
My identity and purpose is given to me by Christ - not created for me by man. It doesn't matter what anyone says. It doesn't matter how many magazines taunt us with a body-image that is fake and unattainable. It doesn't matter what anyone throws at us, or how Satan tries to discourage us. The truth remains the same! We are loved. We are important. We are precious. We are chosen. We are found. We have purpose! If we believe anything other than what God has said about who we are, that's a lie, and the things we believe always affect our lives. It can be a struggle not to give in to these lies, but it's a choice to believe and walk in the the things that God says about us!
So choose life! In John 10:10 Jesus says, "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I have come that they may have life, and have it to the FULLEST." Fullness of life. This is what people are missing. So many people can't figure out a purpose for life... life has no meaning and no joy to them! This hurts me, because I know there is so much life and adventure out there, but how much more must it hurt our heavenly Father, who's purpose for sending His son to this earth was that we may have life! Fullness of life. We don't even know what that means! We only get a glimpse of it here on earth, but if we are allowing Jesus to take control of every area of our lives, we can live in complete abandon, and experience true life.
But what about discontentment? Even if we believe what God says, it can still be so easy to slip into discontent. In John 7:37-39, Jesus says, "If anyone is thirsty, let hime come to me and drink." In John 4:13 - 14, Jesus says, "Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will be come in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life." During my past year at Bible school, we had to read "The Spiritual Secret of Hudson Taylor." I was so inspired and encouraged by Taylor's life, and by the way that he truly lived in dependance on Christ. One thing Hudson Taylor said that really struck me was this, "Can Jesus meet my need? Yes, and more than meet it...not matter how helpless I am, how hopeless I am, how deep are my soul yearnings - Jesus can meet all, all, and more than meet." Later, after Hudson Taylor's wife has died and his children have all been sent to England, we read this account from him: "Then I understood why the Lord had made [John 4:13-14] so clear to me, 'whosoever drinketh of the water that I shall give him shall never thirst.' Twenty times a day, perhaps, as I felt the heart thirst coming back, I cried to Him: 'Lord, you promised! You promised me that I should never thirst. And whether I called by day or night, how quickly He always came and satisfied my sorrowing heart! So much so, that I often wondered whether it were possible that my loved one who had been taken could be enjoying more of His presence than I was in my lonely chamber."
Taylor truly believed God's promise that He was able to satisfy every need and every thirst. I want this in my life! This had challenged me to hold onto the promise that God has give... He says that if I come to Him, I will never thirst. Thirst has to do with our desires We desire relationship, love, acceptance, security, contentment, peace, etc. The problem is not in the desires, but with the level on which we fill them. The world will always leave us feeling empty and discontent. This is why people feel so lost, alone, depressed, and purposeless - because they are looking to fill their thirsts in the wrong places. The only one who can truly satisfy the human heart is the One who made it. Hudson Taylor called out to God saying, "I'm thirsty." We all have longings and desires. We all have hurts and insecurities. Will we allow Him to fulfill our longings, and to heal our hurts? I know it's hard. I've walked the path. Put your hope in the Lord. He has good things in store. As I read Romans 5 today, I was again reminded that we can even rejoice in the midst of suffering, because we know that He is doing good things, and that whatever valley we walk through is used to teach and mature us, and some day, we will be like Him.
My dear friend Steph posted recently saying, "Imagine if everyone really knew who they were, what they were truly worth, and were totally content and satisfied with that. I think it could change a life. It could change a street. It could change a city. It could change a nation. And I think it could change the whole world!" It seems that everywhere we look people are struggling, and unhappy. I'm not saying that it's wrong to struggle, and wrong to grieve. It's true that we live in a world of hate, violence, evil, and sin. The world is a messy place, and bad things happen. However, I know that in the midst of all of this, there is a good and loving God.
So, whoever you are, whether you know Christ or not, please take my word for it. You are beautiful, you are loved, you are valued. Your life has a purpose, and despite the valleys and the storms, there are good things in store! Fill your head with truth. Don't allow the lies to sink in. Search for Jesus, and allow Him to fill you, and allow Him so satisfy. All you need is a little faith. Yes, the storms will come, and yes they will be difficult. But you are a child of the Most High God - an all-powerful God - who is walking with you every step of the way. In the midst of suffering and hurt, choose life. Don't put yourself down. Don't compare yourself. Be content with who you are. When you're focused on yourself, you're missing out on life... and there is so much out there!
I once was lost.
But now I'm found.
